Philip Yancey's views on the issue of Homosexuality

I recently read on a friends blog that Philip Yancey will be the keynote speaker at this years Gay Christian conference. There is alot of controversy about this since some say he is endorsing the homosexual lifestyle by speaking there and others say he is to conservative to be speaking there.

He has mentioned the topic in a few of the books I have read (see this past blog post of mine for one such reference from his book Disappointment with God) But I wanted to find out more about his beliefs rather then a few sentences here or there.

He is one of my favorite Christian writers so I decided to search to see if I could find more about what his beliefs are about the issue of Homosexuality. Well I searched and was very lucky and happy to see he has a whole page on his website talking about his beliefs on this issue where he answers several questions on his thoughts about homosexuality and the christian that people have sent him.

I think overall he has a very balanced view. He is careful not to outright say what he thinks about christians in homosexual relationships since he says he has found once its out there people wont listen to you who dont agree with you on either side.

"It would be more accurate to say that I intentionally don’t take sides on this issue. I’ve observed that as soon as a person does take sides, communication ends. I hear from gay Christians who are very disappointed that I don’t condone their point of view, and I hear from traditional Christians who are very disappointed that I don’t condemn homosexual behavior. As long as I get angry letters from both sides, I feel better.

Do I agree with gay Christians’ interpretations of the six passages in the Bible that may or may not relate to their behavior? No. They may be right, but so far I’m unconvinced. I also disapprove of sexual promiscuity, whether of the hetero- or homo- variety.

Nevertheless, I start with what I’m sure of: my attitude toward homosexuals. It seems to me that’s the clearest message we have. And the atmosphere of judgment and condemnation is so strong that I feel no need to represent a balanced viewpoint myself. So I don’t take an official position. I simply try to love the gay individuals I know, and bring a little grace and mercy to a church that puts this particular sin—if indeed it is that—in a special category. I’d rather maintain contact with “gay Christians,” who are so isolated, and also conservative Christians, who often have little understanding of the issue."

Also he says while he has been to gay churches and found really committed christians at some of them he does not think its a good idea to build a church around this one issue and be isolated from the rest of the body of Christ.

I really liked this quote

"On an issue like this, I try to start with what I’m absolutely sure of, and work outwards. I’m sure of what my own attitude should be toward gays and lesbians: I should show love and grace. As one person told me, “Christians get very angry toward other Christians who sin differently than they do.” When people ask me how I can possibly stay friends with a sinner like Mel, I respond by asking how Mel can possibly stay friends with a sinner like me. After all, Jesus had much to say about greed, hypocrisy, pride and lust—sins I struggle with—but did not mention homosexuality. Even if I conclude that all homosexual behavior is wrong, as many conservative Christians do, I’m still compelled to respond with love.

Do I believe that gay people can be committed Christians? Absolutely. I know far too many of them to doubt that. I also believe that alcoholics and prideful hypocrites can be committed Christians. In short, sinners can, and I’ve stepped back from ranking other people’s sins. It may be helpful for us to think through our relationships with divorced people. Do I feel awkward? Do I avoid talking about their current partner, or former life? Or I think of my greedy friends, or gluttonous friends. How do I handle their weaknesses?"

Here is the link to the page talking about the issue of homosexuality on his web site: http://www.philipyancey.com/q-and-a-topics/homosexuality He has alot of interesting things to say about this subject so check it out!

I am interested in hearing what his speech will be like at the Gay Christian conference later this week. Hopefully they will post a transcript or a video of it somewhere.

What do you think? Do you agree with his beliefs on this subject? Do you think its a good idea for him to speak at this conference?

Dare to Love

Hey all its been awhile again! Just want to post an update if you care to read. First of all I have good news. I did indeed start going to a small group at my church! Last night was my second small group meeting. It has been really amazing. I have never really been in a small group since I was always afraid they would find out about my SSA. Anyways they really share ALOT in this group and are incredibly vulnerable to one another. Its really good for me to hear that other Christians have struggles too. Not that I did not already know that but seeing it and hearing the struggles first hand is just something I needed I guess. They have struggles but still love eachother and pray for one another and support one another. I already know and feel that at some point I will share my struggle with SSA with them. Probably not for awhile but I think I will someday. Its funny last nights meeting the topic was sharing your "impossible" prayer request. So we talked about that for awhile then went around the room and shared our impossible request. Some shared about unsaved loved ones, or family with cancer etc... Others shared personal things they struggle with. Anyways as they were going around the room I was terrified and like no way am I ready to share my "impossible" request. But I did come up with another thing that has always seemed impossible too. I asked them to pray that I feel safe to share about struggles and that I can open up more with them. I explained how I have many walls around myself and I really want to be more open with people in my life. Anyways they then of course pressed me further and we talked for a little while. They asked if it would be easier for me since I am quiet if they made it a point to ask me how I am doing in the group meetings and I said sure that would be great.

I am really happy and thankful to God that he gave me the courage to join this small group. I am finally learning what real Christian fellowship is and its a pretty amazing thing. They share their burdens and struggles with eachother and support eachother just like it says to do in the Bible. I am looking forward to the meetings every week now and I think 2011 could be an amazing year for me where I will finally let people in to see the real me. By real me I am not talking about SSA I just mean me in general. Like I said I may not share the SSA stuff for a long time but I mean I hope to let them see the real me that I show on this blog who I have always been hiding because of fear and shame.

Its been an amazing experience so far and its only been a couple of weeks. Thanks for all your prayers as you all really gave me the strength, encouragement, and self-esteem to do this. Can't wait to see what God has in store for me next! :)

I want to end this post with a quote from "The Inner Voice of Love: A Journey Through Anguish to Freedom" by Henri Nouwen. This book has had a real impact on me. Its such a short book but so deep I have been reading and re-reading parts of it very very slow.I dont think its a coincidence that I read this part of the book for the first time just as I was joining the small group! Here it is:

"Friendship has been a source of great pain for you. You desired it so much that you often lost yourself in the search for a true friend. Many times you became desperate when a friendship you hoped for didn't materialize, or when a friendship begun with great expectations did not last....But now you must seek friends to whom you can relate from your center, from the place where you know you are deeply loved. Friendship becomes more and more possible when you accept yourself as deeply loved. Then you can be with others in a non-possessive way....Dare to love and to be a real friend. The love you give and receive is a reality that will lead you closer and closer to God as well as to those who God has given you to love."(pages 80-81)

Anyways this chapter really encouraged me to take a step out and trust God and dare to reach out and love and be vulnerable with others. But even more it made me realize I have to love myself first. After all if God loves me even though I sin and fail so often then surely I can love myself too and realize I am worth having as a friend. God is slowly helping me to do just that! I think I have taken a good first step in this journey to be more real with others and I pray God gives me the courage to continue to do so more and more!

Thankful

Some things I am thankful for on this Thanksgiving eve:

-Thankful for you all, my brothers and sisters in Christ, who may or may not struggle with the same things I do but all know what it is like to struggle against sin.

-Thankful to God for doing so much in my life since Thanksgiving of last year! I never would have imagined then that I would have a blog where I talk about my struggles with SSA and my life. Or that I would tell my brother of my struggles and that he would respond with love and compassion.

-Thankful for the support and prayers I have received from you all. Some of you have really changed my life with your encouragement, friendship, and advice and I thank you so much and it means more to me than you will ever know.

-Thankful for having a great family that loves me and showed me Gods love for me from a young age.

-I am thankful for finally realizing over the last months that I am not some sort of different class of sinner for having this struggle but just a sinner like anyone else who struggles and needs a savior.

-I am thankful that my shame has lessened so much since actually talking about my struggles instead of keeping it all inside like I used to.

-Thankful that God loves me more than I could ever know and wants what is best for me even if its painful for me in the short term.

-Thankful I am finally starting to get out more from time to time and hang out with other Christians. Sure I am still as awkward and shy as ever but hopefully friendships will form at some point if I keep trying and trusting God and refrain from judging or looking down on myself when things don't happen as quickly as I wish they would.

-Thankful for God not giving up on me even when I had given up on myself many times over. He has never abandoned me and loves me and every day He shows me more how much thats true.

-I am thankful to be alive!!

Love you all and hope you have a good Thanksgiving Thursday (whether you celebrate it or not) and realize we have much to be thankful for.

19 How abundant are the good things
that you have stored up for those who fear you,
that you bestow in the sight of all,
on those who take refuge in you.

20 In the shelter of your presence you hide them
from all human intrigues;
you keep them safe in your dwelling
from accusing tongues.

21 Praise be to the LORD,
for he showed me the wonders of his love
when I was in a city under siege.

22 In my alarm I said,
“I am cut off from your sight!”
Yet you heard my cry for mercy
when I called to you for help.

23 Love the LORD, all his faithful people!
The LORD preserves those who are true to him,
but the proud he pays back in full.

24 Be strong and take heart,
all you who hope in the LORD.

-Psalm 31:19-24 (NIV)

-AJ

Did God Make Me Gay?

I just found this new to me blog called "God's Love – Our Witness" a couple of days ago after Inge, the blog owner there, posted a very thought provoking comment to my blog.

So I explored her blog after reading the comment and I really liked this article she posted the other day titled "Did God Make Me Gay?" Here is a small part of the article that spoke to me the most:

While God walked this earth in human flesh as Jesus Christ, He made clear that He identifies with those who suffer because of the ravages of sin in this world. He healed the sick, the lame, the blind, the lepers. He taught that their conditions were not necessarily the result of their personal choices. And if Jesus walked this earth today, He would identify with the gay people of the world, not condemning them, but drawing them to Himself, just like He drew the outcasts of society two thousand years ago.

We live on a planet that demonstrates the effects of sin – not necessarily particular sins, but sin in general. The Apostle Paul tells us that the “whole creation groans together” under the curse of sin, waiting for the deliverance that comes when Christ returns to this planet again. And a homosexual orientation is just one of the many and varied effects of sin on this planet. That does not mean that homosexually oriented persons are any more sinful than heterosexually oriented persons. It just means that their road in life is more difficult in some respects than that of a heterosexually oriented person in otherwise similar circumstances. And with more difficulty comes more grace.

Anyways be sure to check out the whole blog post there as this is just a tiny portion of it and I thought it was a really good post.

Overcoming Sin and Temptation

Thanks to a few posts on Joe's blog (http://alreadybutnotyetresurrected.blogspot.com/) about John Owen's books about Temptation and Sin I decided I wanted to try and read one of his books too as it seems like they go really in depth on the subject. Joe gave me his recommendation on which book to buy so the one I got was "Overcoming Sin and Temptation" a collection of three books on Sin and Temptation by John Owen.

I must say its a tough read but already I am learning alot and I am not very far in. This is really powerful stuff! Hopefully I don't need a PhD to understand it all and don't get to bogged down in the old language. :) It is slow going as I sometimes have to re-read a sentence two or three times but it has been worth it so far. Wish me luck (or even better pray) that I continue to not only read this important book on sin and temptation but also understand what Owens is saying!

I Can't believe I am writing this

Its kind of a miracle I am even writing this. You see I have never told anyone of this struggle I have so this is a huge step for me. I am a 30 year old Christian male and I have struggled with same sex attractions since probably around age 11 or 12. I grew up in a great Christian home with loving parents and became a Christian when I was young. I have always been very secretive about these feelings and have battled them on my own afraid of how people would react to me if they knew the truth. I finished college five or six years ago and somehow even managed to keep my feelings a secret from everyone there as well. I am pretty lonely sometimes as I sadly tend to keep people at a distance so they wont get to close. Its kind of ironic I am sharing this here for the whole world to see and yet not with anyone I know. Oh well I guess I am a coward.

I am so thankful to God that somehow despite my very strong temptations I am still a virgin physically since I have never acted out these feelings with anyone. However mentally I am definitely not and have given into my lusts to many times to count through porn and fantasies. I had been doing really good in that area though up to a few days ago when I gave into my lusts and fantasies and was looking at porn for the first time in probably 3 or 4 months. After I was done I felt so depressed, alone, and sick of myself and like God must be so sick of me too. I once again felt I was a hypocrite by praying to God afterwards and asking for forgiveness when I knew I would probably fail again. I went to bed and cried and prayed, and prayed and cried to Jesus for forgiveness until I fell asleep.

The next day as I sat depressed and alone about failing again I decided to search google for “Christians who have same sex attractions” or some search term like that and I somehow stumbled onto a few blogs of fellow Christians who struggle with SSA. I cant tell you how much it meant to me to find these blogs and see that other Christians were also struggling with this and sharing their thoughts, pain, hopes and dreams as they tried to live for God. I spent probably the next 4 or 5 hours reading blogs from fellow SSA Christians and for the first time in a long time felt I was not alone with these feelings. I think the bottling up of this struggle inside me has really been slowly destroying me and sending me deeper and deeper into depression, loneliness, and fear. I really believe God led me to these blogs of other Christians with SSA because he wanted me to see I was not alone but also I felt maybe He wanted me to open up about my struggles by starting a blog of my own and not try to keep it all inside. Granted this blog is pretty anonymous but having this outlet to share my struggles and thoughts I am hoping will really be a help to me in my walk.

For the longest time I was desperate for God to heal me of these thoughts and feelings and prayed for that constantly. I don't even know how many times over the years I have prayed and cried out to the Lord to take these feelings from me and make me "normal". Probably to many times to count. Growing up as a teenager there was no worse feeling then praying for healing while in church with my eyes closed and then after praying opening my eyes, and instantly like a magnet having them fall on a guy I was attracted to and then the thoughts would begin. It would make me feel like the biggest hypocrite and sinner to have these thoughts in church of all places and I wanted to run away and hide. I still do pray for a miracle but I guess I am finally starting to figure out that these thoughts and attractions may be with me for life.

Why am I like this? Am I some kind of a mistake? I will probably never know until I get to heaven and can ask God myself. However, between now and then I am hoping I will start to understand myself more and learn to accept myself for who I am, a person who sins and struggles but that God created for a reason and loves. It’s a long journey ahead and I am sure I will fail many times but I hope I can be honest and share my experiences with you. I will write more posts later telling more about myself. If you feel like sending up a prayer for me its always appreciated.

I gotta say its a huge weight off my shoulders just writing this down and letting someone, anyone, know I have these struggles even if no one ever reads this. Thanks for listening.